Friday, December 17, 2010

It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year… Supposedly

It's the weekend before Christmas and I found myself wandering at Orchard Road (again). The road lighting is grand, the malls are competing for the most attractive x-mas designs. There were giant snowmen, larger than life x-mas wreaths and x-mas trees as high as the mall themselves. There were mini-stages here and there with x-mas carol contest going on for every boutiques. Their songs are even overlapping each other. Makes you wonder is it Silent night you are hearing or Jingle bells? The Human traffic was horrible, with every couple, friends and families stopping to take pictures of the brilliantly lit street. Everywhere I look, every body looks happy, even the volunteers of Salvation Army in the corner standing there for a whole day with their bells and x-mas hats asking for donations and whatnots, looks contented.

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It could be the perfect x-mas... except that I'm here and my family,  and friends are far-away, taking pictures of each other, without me in them. Going to CCP and eating dried squids or fish balls, buying and receiving gifts in return. Gifts that comes from the heart and not because it's compulsory for the x-mas party at the office. They will be eating, puto bumbong and bibingka, and pinoy style spaghetti and keso de bola and every heart stopping food out there, and not the laksa or meesiam (noodles with diff soups) that I usually eat. I think I'll be treating myself a double spicy chicken burger at Mc Donald's, and that's about it. They will be out on x-mas morning visiting Ninong and Ninang, and giving aguinaldo to their inaanak, while I sleep my head off hopefully until 2PM because my house mates are strangers and they have to work on x-mas day and leave me home alone again.In the evening they'll feast some more and grow fat and accumulate cholesterol while I wash my clothes and iron some long sleeves because well, there’s work to do on monday.

Well, I could phone them, I definitely would. Just to hear their jokes and well wishes and their voices. I would hear them say "uwi ka na kuya" or request stupid things like "gusto ko ng dunkin donut pag uwi mo" . I'd be happy and sad at same time, until my cell phone load runs out after 30mins-45mins of international telebabad. After that, I'd be sad and miserable and wretched again, then I'll just probably force myself to sleep again.. on x-mas day.

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I read somewhere (was it Shantaram?), that the character loves to sleep so much because you can't be sad when you're sleeping. That you can be happy and afraid when you dream, but you have to be fully awake to be sad. Somehow that makes sense. I can attend parties,yeah, that would be great. But then again, It's parties without my family and close friends, I'll be bored to death. It's almost always a best thing to be bored alone, than be bored with someone else. At least when you're alone you can go to sleep. Geddit?

So that's what will happen this week. Christmas week. I shudder to think what will happen next week. New years week. I have not heard any single watusi even.

Well, I can do all those things McCully Culkin did at Home Alone franchice. Set booby traps and all, or something to that effect. But I'm just amusing myself.

Anyhoo... Merry Chirstmas to all. And Merry Xmas too me too. I Hope.

5 comments:

  1. Cheer up! You're not alone with your feelings. Everyone has to go through phases of loneliness an misery. I know that from experience. And I also have work on Monday :)

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  2. going out might leave you miserable and bored--yearning to be with family and friends instead of strangers-- but do it. you can iron your shirt later. don't let this longing inhibits you to go out and experience Christmas with or without the watusi and bibingka ;)

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  3. @whathisname - I try to cheer up, I do. Honestly. Nothing can cheer me up than a shooting and wasting films and people watching with my friends here. But at the end of the day, when I am in my room alone, this melancholy feeling attacks.

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  4. @Mayet - even my close friends here are going to back to PH :( No i have nobody to party with. I received some invitations from my colleagues though...

    (she was lurking in my blog and read my post hahaha and took pity )

    ReplyDelete
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